AM Saturday

eats-
Giant meatastic salad.

dinner- v day dinner (late)
6 oysters raw
an order of fried oysters
twice baked potato..



bowl cheerios skim
orange slices
1 pancake sugar free syrup

sliced turkey and cheese roll ups

chinese food!!!
some pork strips, crab rangoons, dumplings, and small part of a kid happy box..\
urgh.. full...
I know that Chinese was not a good choice. I know that. The problem with the Chinese food
is that you have to order so much food to get what you actually want!
then there is a lot of food in the house and you keep on eating...
I need to stop DOING this!!! If i am ordering dumplings, Thats what i should order. not a kid happy
box of fried food cos "Ill still be hungry after the dumplings" and then my sister wants
crab rangoons so I get a large rangoon and a second order of dumplings for her not to mention that
the kid box already had rangoons in it!!!!
what i should have done was get one kid box one dumpling and one rangoon and split the whole thing with
amber!!! what was i thinking! and by now I have so much money spent that they give me a free general gau chicken!!!
I DONT NEED THAT!!!!! IM ON A DIET!
but I happily take it. and i will try to give it away untill i eventually eat it.



whatever.. whats done is done.. Lesson learned. My sister has come home to roost thereby taking
over my exercise room so I'm going to have to be more clever about timing until she inevitably
goes away again..

so I went grocery shopping today after i drove her to work, and i feel as though i made some good choices
mostly meat dairy fruit and vegetables. and juice and diet drinks.
i avoided the entire center of the store.
I have way too much of that stuff to go through in my house right now to feel good about buying more.
also that stuff is mostly crap..
so a good start to a sick day.. regardless of how sick and voiceless I am.
I think now that Ive vitamined and cleaned up a lil bit I am gonna work out and then go to the ER.

ok, well my plans for today have somewhat changed.
i did Gylad which was HARD by the way I got into the groove that i was in last time..
these shows rock because they come in 10 minute incraments.. First its cardio! and they work your ass off.
but you think just a few more minutes then commercial!!! and then you do the floor work!
crunches (various) and butt!!! (leg lifting) your knee is crunching into the floor cos you arent
really prepaired and have no yoga matt!
but you love it!
and then, the cool down, the sweet strechy cool down.. and then you see a commercial for the bollywood dance
workout and you decide that maybe, just maybe you could work out again in a half hour! so while you wait for the cable guy

you will wash dishes and call the ged lady but not shower. because that would be the end of it.
Yeah, i would say Im back in the swing. if i can keep my momentum. I will be alright.
and yeah I think Im going to keep avoiding my shithead friend who called me fat and ugly, cos i
think that shame spiraled me back into fatness again.

So, for the past month Ive been feeling pretty crappy.
sure I have excersised a few times, and ate a few more salads.
But as far as my newfound boost? no.. that never happened..
The night before valentines day I got ill.. still went out drinking the night away and woke up with
a terrible cold. I mean kick ass. james and I decided that my v-day gift this year could be a gym membership and i toured healthworks last saturday aside from the ginger brandy Im taking with theraflu pm. so, yesterday after work i did that! i slept from about 4-8 pm. then i woke up watched tv till about midnight and went back to bed. This morning when i woke up i didnt think, i just acted.. still sick i got up and did yoga. namaste yoga on fit tv is a very cool program for those of you who dont know.
now Im making bacon hard boiled eggs and crispex (while watching dr oz) for breakfast. after breakfast I am going to exersise with gyllad and run my puppy around the town.
sound like a good start to a one day at a time plan?

cutting the crap

Ok well, I guess I had better start by stating the obvious.
Ive gained weight.
Im unhappy in my skin and need to change things.
so Knowing damn well that if i try to do something very extreme I will probably
not only fail but gain more weight too..
so, I will not go Vegan again or on atkins. (although both have worked for me in the past)
I plan to seriously cut the crap.
I plan to exercise.
I plan to eat a LOT. i want to eat a lot of low fat low calorie and low carb food and
a little of the not so good things so I dont go crazy.
the trick is here. I want to be so full from the good for me foods that I dont need to eat a
whole lot of crappy junky food.
and I plan to talk about it. here. a lot
In the past this has worked Very well for me.
so, Im two days into this and Im going to catch you up.
and I will try to update this daily after that.


monday-

eats-
half cup ice coffee
big bowl of maypo
egg mcmuffin
hash brown

excersise-
shimmy
gyllad

eats-
steamed chicken and vegitables
sm. egg drop soup.
Im pretty proud of myself.

Tuesday
woke up with serious hunger.
eats:
ate a half a SMALL chocolate
muffin slowly while i waited for
hash browns to come out of the oven
3 hash brown pattys for breakfast
3 hard boiled eggs with salt and pepper (usually I add margrine)


excersise:
walked to and from work.

eats:
I got home and james had a bag of doritos.
I had a few handfuls that probably added up to a large
handful of doritos. realized what i had done closed the bag and put it away.
wheat nan pizza yeah it sounds bad, but think about it.
its wheat bread with tomato sauce and two slices of provolone cheese. so basicly the worst part was the cheese.
a few more bites of the chocolate muffin from breakfast cos i
was having a serious chocolate craving. thought twice and
threw the rest of the muffin away.


right now as i speak its 10:38 at night.
and Im still kinda hungry. but im going to go to bed instead.
I need to work early in the morning.
goodnight everyone.